Obviously I don't have anything very original to share, but I do feel like I understand a little bit about what Max is going through because of my personal trials over the years. I had a decent amount of success in athletics in my life. I certainly wasn't a starting QB at a major university and in the NFL, but I do understand the false sense of security and confidence that comes with being the BMOC(sorry...couldn't think of a better term). It allows guys, like me, that pride themselves on something as meaningless as being good at a sport to feel invincible or above the fray. It becomes your entire identity. And, why? Because you can run fast or throw a ball hard? When you look at it from a big picture point of view, it's just silly.

Anyway, along with making that your identity, you become susceptible to buying into your own advertising. A few jersey chasers think you're great, and you start to believe them. I'm sure Max would validate that the sound of 65k people cheering him on at LES was like crack...it truly is a high. He experienced that high and the high of being a celebrity for a number of years. I'm sure it started for him at a young age. So, his NFL career ends and he has to wake up to being just a normal guy that nobody worships. In fact, in his mind, he'd gone from King of the football world to a total failure. AA talks about "delusions of personal grandeur"...and athletes have issues with that at alarming rates. There's a reason why substance abuse takes down a large number of former athletes. Imagine waking up to happiness every day for 10 years, and then it immediately stops. You now have no way of replicating that high that playing football and, really, every day life has been giving you. There's one answer...go find it.

And, it looks like Max found it in coke. I'm obviously speculating here, but I'd be shocked if his only issue is coke. I know a ton of recreational coke users, but Max's actions certainly don't lend him to being that. I can speak from personal experience when I say that there's nothing...NOTHING...in the world that will stop you from getting that high. Losing your family, friends, job, dignity...none of that matters. The feeling of relaxation and relief when the drug or alcohol hit your body is indescribable. All is right in the world and you can pretend for that few hours that you are who you wish you were. Max is clearly full of self-hate. Self-hate is the largest driving factor in why someone uses. Drugs/alcohol aren't the problem...they're the solution.

I'll pray for Max. He clearly needs help and I truly hope he gets it. He's going to need years of therapy to accept who he is and be ok with what has happened to him.