My youngest is 23 but I still remember those feelings. I wish I could tell you the magic words to say, rewards/bribes to offer or restrictions/punishments to use. But it wouldn't help because the specific things that worked for one kid didn't work for the others--and often only worked for a limited time with that kid. Years later, my adult kids told of some things that worked that I thought were total failures at the time--times when I felt like a complete, defeated loOsser.

Sometimes patience and long suffering with love unfeigned is the only prescription. And that means trying again and again and again with as much innovation and cleverness as you can beg, borrow or steal.

The good news: the good news outweighs the bad news.