Go look at our recent recruiting classes. The are finding 2 star guys who are players.
It's easy to be at USC and offer all the 5 and 4 star players. At BYU you need to find the 3 and 2 star guys who can play, who want to be at BYU, and who are good fits for BYU. It is far from an easy task, and Broncos staff has done an exceptional job.
As to your point 3: most coaches play favorites. Lavell being very guilty of this. I was very close to the players and coaches during the 1990's. Biggest complaint was Lavell playing favorites. To some degree it is human nature, to another degree it is that the head coach may have a differing opinion than you or me.