My wife and I are addicted to making outlandish jokes and pranks in public. For instance, last week I got her a massive basket with an array of live plants (for brownie points of course), and when she saw it, she decided it was too big and asked me to return it. So I went to the return counter at Smith's and said that I had purchased this plant the day before as a gift to my daughter, who was delivering her first child. Then I said that the baby died during delivery, so I decided that if she can't keep a human alive, she definitely can't keep a plant alive. That chick's eyes went so big, and she didn't even laugh when I said, "just kidding".

Anyway, years back when I went to see Saving Private Ryan, my plan (just as the closing credits began), was to loudly say, "That wasn't nearly as funny as I expected". But I just couldn't do it. The movie had me floored and you could hear a pin drop. I bet I could do it now though (after years of my wife and I trying to out embarrass each other in public).

Oh great, now I want to go see the new Hunger Games movie and applaud loudly any time one of the good characters are killed. I love making people embarrassed for me. I blame it on my wife. Despite her 8th grandchild on the way, she'll still go to a restaurant and keep up the act of conversing with and ordering for her imaginary friend. The waiters/waitresses never laugh. They have no idea how to react.