Only read this if you're bored and need a distraction. Don't say I didn't warn you.

My wife and I did some camping and slot-canyon-hiking over the weekend for her birthday. On the way back, we were on that barren stretch of highway 6 between Green River and Price, and we saw a sign for a dinosaur quarry. Since we were having adventures just the two of us, we decided to give it a try. It turns out that it was 30 miles on a dirt road. As we were driving along, I said to my wife, "Look at this place: we are on the moon." The terrain was just gray, ugly, barren, and it went on for miles and miles. Even the sky was cloudy and gray, It was like we had driven into a black and white movie, only without the cheesy soundtrack music.

We didn't see a soul for the longest time, but then we came upon two cars parked at the side of the road. The two drivers were out of their cars, and one of them waved his pipe at us as we went by (yes, a pipe, like you would use for smoking). We think they had maybe 7 teeth between them. My wife decided they were doing a drug deal, because they quickly closed their car doors as we came by, plus, why else would they be out there? Well, burying bodies was a much more likely scenario, but who am I to quibble with my wife. So, for her benefit, we went with the drug-dealer theme, and decided to name them Meth Bob and his cousin LeRoy.

We continued on our way through the Land of Desolation's uglier sister. Pretty soon we came across...a fire hydrant. Of course there's a fire hydrant miles and miles from everything. What the heck was going to burn out here? Dirt? It was right near a fence, but we really couldn't figure out the point. Oh, and the fence just went along lazily then just ended. Like they just got tired of putting up a fence, and couldn't see the point anyway. Or, more likely the fence builder just died during construction.



About this time, Meth Bob and LeRoy were coming along in their respective vehicles, so we stopped taking photos of the loneliest fire hydrant, and moved along again. We really didn't want to provide these guys with another couple of bodies to bury, you see. I moved along pretty well, and we either lost them, or they gave up the chase. Probably they were tired of burying bodies that day anyway.

Before too long, we noticed something strange off to the north. A cemetery. That's right, we’d been driving miles and miles through desolation, just a little freaked out about Meth Bob and LeRoy, and when we finally lost them, we came across an old cemetery. In the middle of nowhere. With nothing around. It kind of went with the theme, so, of course, we had to check it out.



It was the old cemetery for a town named Victor, which we later found out no longer exists. A sign posted there said, "Historical Cemetery, no new burials" or something to that effect. Interestingly enough, it looked like some people ignored the sign. Yep, there was somebody buried there from 2016. That wasn’t weird at all. Most of the graves were from the early 1900's though. The main gate to the cemetery was like some sort of bizarre turnstile. I was filming with our video camera, and told my wife to go over and give it a spin. I fully expected to hear it give off a scary creak, and even said so. But, no--even creepier, it made no noise at all. None. It just spun noiselessly, as if the cemetery residents rise up nightly to lubricate it.

We finished walking around, checked our clothing for any stray zombies that might be latched on, then continued on to the dinosaur quarry (which we found, and actually had a nice visitor’s center). All in all, it was an exciting adventure into a part of Utah I had never seen before, and probably never care to see again. But, if you happen to need to scare the heck out of somebody some Halloween night in the future, this should be on your list of possibilities.




(not sure why CB turned this sideways, but I guess that adds to the creepiness factor)