others - I don't throw people under the bus and try hard to not to appear as though I am (i.e. going around people to speak to their manager to get things changed, etc), and I always thank people for their time and for whatever help they've provided. However, I increasingly find myself in situations where I have to go above people to their manager to initiate a change to certain processes, and I'm always concerned that having to do so will upset people or give them the impression that I'm throwing them under the bus.

My co-worker likes to remind me on regular basis that no good deed goes unpunished, and the nice-guy approach tends to give people an excuse to say no or to blow off whatever is asked of them. I get that, but I also don't want to be a jerk or viewed as a butt-hole.