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Jun 19, 2017
2:00:22pm
CougaReb All-American
Everyone's experience will be different, but here are some thoughts:
My wife and I both live in separate states from our parents and siblings. Although we have done well being independent and away from our families, we do miss them and try to see them frequently. We are about a full day's drive from her family and a two-day drive from my family. We drive to her family about three times per year, and her family (parents or siblings) visit us about three or four times per year. -- With my family (being farther away), we typically visit them once per year, and they come to us once per year.

That said, here are some principles/thoughts to keep in mind:

(1) Happy wife = happy life. Spending vacation time and resources for your wife to stay close to her family will allow her to continue being happy while living far away from them (at least a day's drive). You might feel like you're spending a lot of time with your in-laws, but living within an hour or two of them would likely mean a lot more interactions (though with the benefit of not having to use vacation time to see them).

(2) Stages of life will change your travel plans. When it was just me and my wife (without kids), we traveled more and would go visit our family more often. Now, with kids (i.e., added costs, school schedules), we don't visit as often. The grandparents come to us more now, which has been a nice trade-off, but we don't see our siblings and their kids nearly as much. I wish we could see each other more often now that our families are growing up, but the distance makes that difficult.

(3) No substitute for family. Living far from family can be a challenge. Close friends can make up for much of the day-to-day interactions, but there really is no substitute for your own family. To maintain relationships while living far away, traveling to see them may be an investment worth making.

(4) The desire to be close to family will depend on your relationships with them. Some may choose to reluctantly visit family once per year; others will want to travel to see family as often as occasion permits. Your own choices will largely be determined by how much you and your wife enjoy being around family.
This message has been modified
Originally posted on Jun 19, 2017 at 2:00:22pm
Message modified by CougaReb on Jun 19, 2017 at 2:03:11pm
CougaReb
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CougaReb
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