Fifth Annual Kickoff Classic Golf Tournament

Introduction

Yes, we're doing it again. Join us for our annual season kickoff golf fest. Meet the people you've mocked anonymously over the past year, and join your fellow Cougar fans (and several Utes) as we get pumped for the season opener against Arizona.

The Course

We're trying a new course this year. Set near the Olympic cross country courses above Heber Valley, Soldier Hollow provides a scenic and challenging test. Senioritis, mindful of Team Spandex's past performances in the areas of excavation and strip mining (the Talon's Cove greenskeeper insisted that we wear hard hats), predicts that following this year's event the course will be renamed either Soldier Crevasse or Soldier Gorge.

Tournament Format

As in years past, we'll go with a four-person scramble from the blue tees. The "hit 'til you're happy" rule will apply to all teams consisting of at least one attorney, an Idahoan who has stolen livestock, and two Utes (who are brought along as eye candy). Rules for the masses will be posted on this site one week before the tournament.

Post-round Lunch

An awards ceremony--which consists mainly of making fun of people on the Board or on Utefans who don't attend--will follow immediately after the round at the clubhouse grill. If you'd like a lunch, prepay $10 when you sign-up and you'll be given your choice of burgers, sandwiches, salads and beverages, modestly subsidized by CougarBoard. Unlike other courses we've played in the past where we were told everyone had to participate or there would be no lunch, the caterer at Soldier Hollow was cool with the idea of making lunch purely optional. He said, and I quote, "Yeah, I know we're dealing with a fanbase that sneaks homemade tuna fish sandwiches into the stadium to avoid paying for food. If they want to bring their own food to the clubhouse grill, there's not a whole lot I can do about it." Prove him wrong and sign up for the lunch. Whether you buy a meal or not, stick around after golf to meet others and have a good time. People who don't want to tee it up can join us for lunch after the round, and can pay only for the lunch.

Prizes

We're still awaiting replies from Crystal Cruises, various European automakers and Catherine Zeta-Jones concerning our requests for prize contributions. In the meantime, we can offer the usual awards of great hats from Zephyr, BYU shirts from Cougar Club, cases of beverages courtesy of a local distributor, and other stuff that may threaten your amateur status. In addition to team prizes, there will be prizes for closest to the hole and long drive. PaloAltoCougar won last year's long drive contest, an amazing feat considering his strength is similar to that of his board icon. Now that BALCO's out of business, this year's contest is wide open.

If anyone wishes to donate prizes or knows someone who might, please boardmail PAC.

Signups

The link at the top will take you to a registration page. Don't bother signing up unless you're ready to pay. You can sign up anytime before August 24. Cancellations prior to that date will receive a refund of the entry fee, minus whatever credit card or PayPal fee is involved.