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Sep 13, 2017
Revolution All-American
Here are the Top-10 Mod Candidate Power Rankings

(1) MonkeyCowboy --- Very popular on the board. Mid-stream political. BroSquad (1,000 lb club). Clearly smart and has a sharp wit. Not afraid to call out the fascists of the board. Deep love for BYU. But despite that, he's on most FO's so he'll be a good mole. ( ^1 )

(2) Cretin (FKA JimmyZ, FKA MallSanta) --- Many feel that Cretin is an obvious choice for Modship. Few non-mod CB'ers keep the rest of CB in line as well as Cretin. In fact, the NSFJZ objective standard is based solely on Cretin's opinion of what is suitable for him to see on the board. Additionally, Cretin's grumpiness will make him an effective mod, with his quick, curt, cutting comments. Lastly, Cretin represents a small demographic that is unrepresented on CB (read "he's really old") a demographic that is growing as many of us continue to age. ( ^1 )

(3) Jezza --- Already a controversial member of the board, Jezza would be well suited for continuing the tradition of having a board villain serve as a mod. Having perfect knowledge of everything because he is San Diegan, British, South African, and has apparently visited the entire world, eaten every type of food, participated in every type of sport, and has first hand knowledge of every major event in history. It is believed that Jezza would moderate the Soccer category liberally. ( ^1 )

(4) TNT --- The evergreen Mod campaigner was an early favorite because of his notoriety and desire for Power. Because of his early work in the campaign, TNT has a strong grassroots following, which he's convinced to support his well demarked platform of creating pinball, tostinos, and paid subscriber hot-or-not categories. Despite his strong, loyal supporters, questions of TNT's suitability have come forward which have greatly undermined his campaign. First, many insiders believe TNT may not even be unqualified for a new Mod position: (1) it is rumored that TNT is ElJefe's dupe, which neither TNT nor ElJefe clearly refuted; (2) TNT may be just be a computer program; (3) it is rumored that TNT is really Kyle Gunther (or at least a 1280 employee) and would have a major conflict of interest moderating a BYU fan board; and (4) TNT may have multiple suspensions equalling over 2 days total for "Hot-or-Not" posts. Second, there are rumors are that TNT would not even accept a Mod position if offered to him, unless that position came with unfettered power to rule as he wished. Lastly, many of CB's oldest members remember the fateful April Fools day when TNT was vested with Mod powers and suspended much of the board, and banished (for life) MVHS_Dynasty. (v3)

(5) Grapevine --- Many like Grapevine's tenacious takes on BYU sports. Others esteem Grapevine's ability to tear apart BYU's coaching blunders, and make quick critiques. Mostly, supporters seems to like the idea of having a mod whose responses would be borderline incoherent. ( ^1)

(6) ThunderBuddy --- Strong early candidate with great grass roots movement. ThunderBuddy ("TB") supporters created a website which showed a lot of promise, creativity, and has a genuine platform that seems to resonate with much of CB. (see: https://electthunderbuddy.wordpress.com/ ) Unfortunately, the testimonials of a certain young child and one from an elderly lady have surfaced, and show an inhumane side of TB. As a result the CB FO world is now questioning whether TB would actually be able to create the atmosphere he is thumping for -- one of a site where FinnGirl and DS7 sit together and discuss the LGBTQ community peacefully over rootbeers. https://donotelectthunderbuddy.wordpress.com/ ( v1 )

(7) VACOUGFAN --- One of the more mild tempered, well behaved CB'ers. VACOUGFAN would swear to bring level headed civility to most appeals. ( ^1 )

(8) BYUJacob --- Author, dentist, action movie afficionado, Yankees fan. BYUJacob has clearly leveraged his connections with the moderate CB'ers, or perhaps his comiccon connections are proving to sway CB support. One individual when questioned who he'd vote for strongly supported BYUJacob saying, "I vote for BYUJacob. Anyone who can write an entire book of Ender's Game fan fiction is hardcore enough to be a MOD." ( Previously Unranked)

(9) Boogers --- Appears to be winning a lot of support from his campaign slogan, "Pick Boogers!!" (Previously Unranked)

(10) ds7 --- Some supporters are rooting this, but it is belived to merely be for entertainment sake. Akin to what would have happened had Clinton replaced Scalia on the Supreme Court, the mod-rule of CB would be flipped with ds7 as a new mod. (unranked) Dropped from Rankings: Nashty, RusskieJedi, Manti



Originally posted on Sep 13, 2017 at 1:08:54pm
Message modified by Revolution on Sep 13, 2017 at 1:11:19pm
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