Stop complaining about being 1-6. Because I say so. You are all bad fans, because I say so. I decide what makes you a “good fan”. And guess what? I am a much better fan than all of you, which speaks volume about my character and life skills.

And I hereby declare all those who are down on this team any number of shame-inducing slights - you are nancies, snowflakes, polyannas, and entitled millennials. So there.

And because we have been bad a long time ago, that makes it ok to be bad now. You should embrace the suck, which is part of being a good fan. I love sucking, because then I can condescendingly show how awesome I am as a person. Can I do that if we were winning? Nope. I say, bring on the losses. I can standout that much more, because these things work best if you make it about yourself, while putting others down.

And another thing, BYU fans are the only fans in the universe who could possibly be so negative about being blown out every week. It’s like you guys don’t understand that being blown out by meh teams means that we all have the unique opportunity to self-righteously and piously focus on making post after post, decrying the “bad fans” in our fanbase. You see, now everyone can see how much better I am than all of you. As a fan of my college football team, and probably in life.