when he's completely caught up in some delusion in his mind about meeting up with his buddies to ride bikes or buying a condo in Vegas. When he briefly snaps back to reality all he wants to do is go home but he can't. They live in Oregon and while he was still lucid he always said he would like for them to perform Dr. assisted suicide if he ever got to the point he is currently at. Nobody in the family has the guts to do it but I'd honestly want the same in his situation, it's super sad.