Emilio Estevez is a huge dork. He forced the Hawks to give up Adam Banks even though It was an innocent mistake all around. The Hawks tried to reasonably explain the situation to Coach Bombay in the lawyer’s office, but he rejects it and throws a quack tantrum in front of everyone. He is such a dork. I would’ve just laughed at him if I were there.

At any rate, Adam Banks humbles himself and joins the team. The Ducks—led by freaking Jussie Smollett—give him the cold shoulder. What jerks! We are supposed to cheer for them???? Even after Banks scores, Smollett refuses to celebrate with him.

Coach Bombay starts to hang out with Charlie Conway one on one after school, which is creepy. What kind of protective single mom would allow an unemployed single dude in his early 30s—one who had a recent DUI—hang out with their kid?

Before the Final against the Hawks as they lined up for the national anthem, all the Ducks are sneering at the Hawks, sticking their tongues out at them, etc. They’re little brats.

They were little ingrates when their sponsor ponied up $15,000 to buy each of them new gear and crisp green duck uniforms. And instead of being grateful they just sneered at the prospect of having to be such a weak animal.

Now the Hawks were pretty despicable themselves. When the coach proposes they take out Banks, the kid’s excited “yeahhhh” reaction rivaled the “put him in a body bag” comment from Cobra Kai. And they shoved down a girl after she scored a goal on them.

I didn’t want either team to win. It was like the Utes playing Boise State. There are no winners.

The movie was worse than I remember.