First of all, obviously your mission president was a (bad word) and he proved it by his life choices. Also, obviously sadness and every other good emotion over the pending loss of your grandmother was loving, kind and benevolent. If you were angry at your grandmother for dying it would be more relatable to this conversation.

A person that commits suicide is either mentally ill, desperate beyond measure or taking a way out from a terrible situation. Its possible that they are selfish in that decision. That is on them. But responding to this situation with our own anger is not godly, because we are either thinking more of our own feelings than theirs or because we are judging them.

Here is my story.

My best hometown friend had a brother that committed many sexual sins with one of his girlfriends and was excommunicated because if it. Has mother was irate and railed on him and threw him out of the family. Her comment was "How could you do this to me?". The son hadn't done it "to her", he had done it to himself and his girlfriend down the street.

Many years later this mother realized in horror that he anger toward her son was not because of the damage he had brought upon himself or the girl, but because she felt he had brought embarrassment to her in the community and ward and made "her" look bad as a parent She repented in sack cloth and ashes and begged for his forgiveness.

The. story of the Prodigal Son is a great lesson. He didn't rush out and curse his son out when he came across the horizon, he fell on this neck and wept.