A few weeks ago my friend asked if my wife and I would like to go on an extended weekend trip to Vegas with him and his wife. We all knew each other at BYU ~20 years ago, so it seemed like a fun opportunity to reconnect since we haven't seen each other much since then. He said that since he made the invitation he'd drive and make arrangements for the hotel.

As we were pulling into Mesquite he made a passing comment about how he never has to stop there and typically is able to get from Spanish Fork to Las Vegas on a single tank of gas.

As he was pumping the gas he pulled out his phone and started typing furiously. I caught a glance and it looked like was using his calculator app. I figured that he was trying to figure out why he hadn't been able to make it all the way to Vegas on a single tank. In any case, after I saw the total price I was glad to be off the hook for paying for a full tank of gas in this economy.

Once he returned to the car his mood changed and he started mumbling about something I couldn't quite hear. So I asked him what was wrong and was blown away by his response. Here's what we said to the best of my recollection:

Me "Hey man, is there anything wrong?"

Him "Yeah, this is crazy. I never have to stop here and fill up a FULL tank. It's so friggin' expensive."

Me "Yeah, that is odd. Did you not start out with a full tank when we left?"

Him "I filled up just before picking you guys up. Seems like something else is dragging our fuel economy down."

Me "Huh, what do you think could have done that?"

Him "I dunno, but I bet it won't be a problem on our next trip."

Me "What do you mean? Are you referring to us?"

Him "Nevermind. We'll talk about it when we get to the hotel."

At this point, I knew exactly what he was referring to. As I mentioned before, we knew each other at BYU and had actually both had a crush on my wife when we were all in the singles ward and she was a Cougarette. But since he hadn't seen us in such a long time he didn't know how things have gone since then. Let's just say that when I refer to my HCBW the "h" doesn't stand for "hot".

Knowing that he was referring to her, my wife jumped in.

Her "Are you trying to say that I'm weighing the car down?"

Him "That's exactly what I'm saying and when we get to Circus Circus I'm splitting our room reservation into two separate rooms."

Her "You booked a single room for us? What were you thinking?"

Him "Whatever I was thinking it was based on information from 20 years ago."

Her "Ha, well you know what I always say. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes."

Him "What does that mean? I've never heard that phrase before."

Her "That's because I invented it and don't have time to explain it to you. How about you just keep driving and drop us off at the Tropicana. I wanted to stay somewhere nicer anyways."

At that point, I knew our friendship was likely over and it was without a doubt the most awkward and uncomfortable situation I'd ever been in. I felt especially bad for the hitchhiker we picked up in Fillmore. But when I saw her rifling through her wallet for gas money I told her to put it all on black once she got to Vegas.