The refs are there out of a hybrid of volunteerism, justified by making a couple bucks on a weekend as a token compensation for their time (“beer money”). Most of them have lives, careers, etc and officiate for “fun” to be around the game and the kids.

Parents often have no idea what they are looking at, don’t understand the rules, and in the case of youth leagues in particular almost never understand that if the referees called every single penalty they saw on every single play, the games would last about 6 hours, instead of 45 minutes like they are scheduled. So the officials are advised by Ute conference to focus their calls on helping the kids learn the game and develop as players.

For example, I once had a grown man start shrieking on the sideline of a 9 year old Ute conference game because the other team substituted players, and one of their players had not quite made it off the field when the ball was snapped (he was literally stepping off the field when it snapped). Because I didn’t call it he started shouting, accusing me of “home cooking” (as though I care who wins a 9 year old pee wee game), being blind, etc.

I could go on and on with examples (I no longer officiate because it ultimately became not worth the time and energy required, mostly because of parents and coaches), but the root of the problem has nothing to do with the referees being “soft” and everything to do with a small group of loud, confused parents that don’t understand what is obvious to everyone else: that youth sports are GAMES played by CHILDREN that should be FUN, and that losing their mind over the way another adult officiates the children’s game is ridiculous behavior that should be mocked.