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May 31, 2023
Ragnar Danneskjold All-American
A woman walks down the street...
At the corner of the street is a three story white house with a large porch. A parrot sits in a cage on the porch by the screen door.

As the woman reaches the corner, she hears from the cage the parrot squawk "You're fat and you're ugly." The woman thinks nothing of it at first but again the parrot squawks "You're fat and you're ugly."

The woman looks angrily at the bird but decides she must press on. She continues on her walk, her day having taken a decided turn for the worse.

The next day, the woman walks to the same corner and again the parrot angrily squawks from in it's cage. "YOU'RE FAT AND YOU'RE UGLY! YOU'RE FAT AND YOU'RE UGLY!"

This outburst puts the woman over the edge. She bursts through the gate and up to the porch and begins angrily knocking on the door of the house; all the while the parrot is squawking "You're fat and you're ugly."

As the owner of the house answers the door, the woman really lets him have it. "I have never in all my years met such a misbehaved pet. He's a nuisance to the neighborhood, and I don't much appreciate the way you let him speak so vulgarly! If you don't do something about him, I will!"

The man, of course, is extremely apologetic and naturally agrees to work with the bird. "Yes maam yes maam, it won't happen again maam."

A few weeks go by and the woman notices that the parrot is not out on his usual perch. One day, while on her daily walk, the lady notices that the parrot has returned. She hesitates at the corner, almost daring the parrot to say something to her. The parrot sits perfectly silent, and then, with almost a smirk on his beak, stares the woman directly in the eye and says calmly, "You know."
Ragnar Danneskjold
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Ragnar Danneskjold
Sep 2, 2011
Last login
Oct 2, 2023
Total posts
67,742 (29,438 FO)

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