Me: "Don't open that butter! There's another one already open!"
*general scramble while finding butter*
Smack: "Good. Now we can drop to level ButterCon 2"
*kids give blank stares*
I explain DefCon system.
*kids give blank stares*
Me: "It's like ComicCon, but for the Defense Department."
Kids: "Oh, cool!"
Smack: "All the generals under the mountain dress up as nuclear warheads. Except one guy is naked."
*kids give shocked stares*
Smack: "He's a stealth missile, so you can't see his costume."
*General mayhem from morally outraged children*