https://www.amazon.com/Six-Pillars-Self-Esteem-Definitive-Leading/dp/0553374397/

I'm not done with it yet, but it's absolutely spot on. Well worth the read. Even if you don't have self-esteem issues (or don't think you do), it can help. And a must read for parents.

In short, you are both absolutely right. Modern "self-esteem" advocates have instead undermined self-esteem, and produced children that cannot think for themselves, deal with criticism, or be confident in their own abilities to get things done.

It almost seems like an intentional ploy by very evil ideologues to undermine individualism and enslave people to government paternalism.