... finds me out working and throws a huge fit that I "do this every time her family comes over". I told her that after twelve years of marriage, it's healthier for everyone if I just duck out after saying hellos instead of being emasculated by the whole family and then finally speaking my mind and making a bunch of people cry.

I can't even eat with them. Waited until it was over to come in and play with my kids and snack on ham.

Before your judge, just now that the foundation of the situation is very, very bad and I wouldn't wish some of these things in my worst enemy. Even Polaris.