Outside of the IRS I can choose where I put my money and BYU can choose how hard they try to get me to give money. But, if BYU wants it, they'd better not frame the situation in such a way that we (donors) aren't relevant. If, they want the donors to continue to kick in, they had better be able to reassure us that the money will be well spent.

Do I want an apology? No. Should BYU issue an apology? Probably not. Would it be a good strategy for BYU to tell me that 'where I put my money is a choice so do what you want but we aren't going to do or say anything to try and reassure you that things will be different'? No. Absolutely not.