Every potential dog owner must have the following honest internal dialogue before acquiring a dog:

My life is too simple, efficient and inexpensive and the time I have alotted for human relationships and service is excessive. Therefore I would like to pay someone to provide me with the equivalent of a special needs child that will never be able to communicate verbally, bathe, toilet train, self-support or self-supervise.
Furthermore, all of my immediate family, friends and neighbors feel similarly and stand ready to care for this child as well.