Hello, PSU fans!

For those of you traveling to Provo, welcome! You are about to experience one of the best-kept secret vacation spots in the country, and I hope you have a GREAT time in Provo!

You're a long way from Pennsylvania, but I hope you feel just as welcome in our Happy Valley as you would in your own Happy Valley. In order to help you out, I'm posting some tips to help maximize your fun while visiting Provo.


In General:

You'll likely fly into Salt Lake City, but if I were you I would stay in Provo where there is far less gangs/violence and where there is superior restaurants and shopping. Trust me - you'll feel much safer in Provo and there's plenty to do without getting "high" or "drunk" or "buzzed" on beer or the crack or whatever. Provo can be a pretty fun and crazy place, and the locals will kill you with kindness. Coming from Pennsylvania, I think you'll find our culture welcoming, friendly, and gospel-oriented!


Lodging:

- Plenty to choose from, but I would seriously consider the Knights Inn on University. It's REALLY inexpensive ($39 - $49), and close to great eateries and shopping. There aren't a lot of frills, but the sheets are ALWAYS washed between guests and it's always vacuumed and clean. There's a pool that has a "No Swimming" sign, but they've rarely kicked me out. There's also an unlocked pool across the street at the Thunderbird Motel.
- There's a Hampton Inn close by but it's ridiculously expensive (over $90).
- If money is no object of concern, there's a Marriott in downtown Provo. This is where "Mormon Royalty" like the Huntsman's and Romney's stay while visiting, so yeah....it's very posh.
- There's a Comfort Inn on University Pkwy in Orem that I would recommend. Pool, exercise room, nice lobby. It's a bit pricey, but it comes with a pretty good continental breakfast (with waffle iron). So, for me and my family (8), it makes more economic sense to pay a few more dollars at the hotel and get a free breakfast rather than skimp on the hotel and end up dropping a 20 spot for my family's breakfast.


Shopping:
- Just an FYI, Orem and Provo have the 2 biggest malls in all of Utah County.
- University Mall is a little further out from the BYU campus (10 minute drive), but it has an awesome treehouse and department stores like Macy's. There's also a Mr. Mac (famous in Utah for men's clothing...you can get a quality wool/poly 2-pant suit for $99 AND get free alterations).
- For more men's clothing needs, also try out the Missionary Mall on University Pkwy. Not only do they have great polyester suit deals, they also sell white shirts and ties for much less than the normal going rate. I was also told by someone 'in the know' that this store sells more weather-proof trench coats to teenage boys than ANY store in the world. So as you can imagine, the selection is incredible.
- Provo Towne Centre mall is not far from campus and it's a bit more up-scale (evident by the spelling). This mall has more posh stores like Dillards, as well as a high-priced movie theater. Also, try the Jamba Juice in the food court - amazing frozen fruit dessert-type drinks.
- Thirty minutes north of Provo is a mega-store called IKEA (furniture and accessories). This place is HUGE and sells very high quality and inexpensive compressed wood furniture that is ready to assemble. And trust me - try the meatballs!
- There is an enormous outdoor camping/hunting store in Lehi called Cabela's. This houses Utah County's largest aquarium, with many varieties of trout. Cabela's also has a VERY generous "customer satisfaction" return policy, so if you need to borrow a jacket or poncho or something for the weekend, I would highly recommend Cabela's.
- There are 3 Costco's in the valley (Orem, American Fork, and Spanish Fork). You are supposed to be a member to shop there, but if you wait for a big crowd and just walk through briskly, they usually don't stop you. I enjoy window shopping there, and on Saturdays there are food samples galore. I've been known to walk out the doors having spent $0 yet absolutely stuffed to the rafters!. They also have massage chairs on demonstration in the furniture aisle, which makes for a very nice, relaxing 30-minute power nap.
- Provo Riverwoods is pretty much the "Rodeo Drive" of Utah County. This is high-roller shopping and dining, but it can be fun to window shop and there's a decent chance of spotting celebrities like Steve Young, Donny Osmond, Robbie Bosco, and Shawn Southwick (ex-wife of Larry King).
- Orem and American Fork both have a Super Target.


Eating:
- There are dozens of grocery stores in town; you really can't go wrong. Smiths deli has some awesome chicken tenders and potato wedges fried fresh daily.
- If you're looking for alcohol, I hear there's a place in Springville that serves microbrewed beer. I don't recall the name of the place, but just ask around and people can explain how to get there (I believe it's next to the Bishop's Storehouse).
- Best restaurant value in town - hands down - is "Chuck-A-Rama". This is the nicer, classier brother of Golden Corral. I would especially recommend this if you're coming a few days early, as Thursday is "seafood night". Just think - All-you-can-eat fried shrimp, fries, tuna patties, seafood salad, etc. and like 100 soda options to pick from. Not to mention the ice cream dessert-bar. They charge children according to age, but they've never ID'd our kids.
- The best pizza in Utah (and I dare say the U.S.) is at The Brick Oven, just off campus. This place is a Provo icon, dating back several generations. As you enter the foyer, you'll find several signed celebrity endorsements, including names like Orrin Hatch, Jeffrey R. Holland, Norm Bangerter, Peter Tuipulotu, The Jets, and The Piano Guys. The Pizza is amazing...the pasta is unreal, and the ambiance is incredible. 6 stars out of 5!
- There's a GREAT burger chain called In-N-Out. This is a gourmet burgers and fries joint that is from California and therefore way cool.
- I've been told that "5 Guys Burger and Fries" makes an excellent burger. I can't verify - they wanted almost $10 for a basic cheeseburger combo meal. I suppose if you're wealthy you could give this a try.
- We have a restaurant called Chili's, which is also a community favorite.
- For the best hot dog west of Chicago, check out J-Dawg's. I'm not sure what's in the special sauce, but it is unlike anything you've ever had in a tube steak!
- I would also recommend Cafe Rio, which is quality fresh fast-food Mexican like you've NEVER tasted. The locals all suggest the sweet pork burrito (if you're calorie conscious, I would suggest the sweet pork salad which rearranges the exact same ingredients in a more healthy format.)
- BY FAR the busiest eatery in town is The Olive Garden. This place has been voted the best Italian restaurant in Utah County several years in a row. They are known throughout the area for their breadsticks, and if you have an appetite, try "The Tour of Italy". You'll need to arrive about 2 hours early on a weekend, but trust me, the breadsticks are worth the wait!
- There's a furniture store called RC Willey that often provides FREE hot dogs and drinks on Saturdays. Soda is usually a bit flat, but the dogs are as good as any place, and FREE!
- There's a local favorite Mexican place at about 100 S. Center St. in Provo called "Los Hermanos" (Mexican word meaning "The Brothers". Try the strawberry virgin daiquiri and thank me later.


Entertainment:
- Orem has the best miniature golf in the valley (Trafalga), with an indoor 18 and an outdoor 18. This also has a pretty big arcade.
- Trafalga also recently added an AMAZING fun center in Lehi. Lazer tag, carny rides, bumper boats, slick track - you name it. And they've gone to great lengths to give it a "Disneyland ambiance" by adding things like the Statue of Liberty and Mt. Rushmore. Five GIANT stars.
- Fat Cats in Provo is about the nicest bowling facility I've ever seen. Fridays they have "Galactic Bowling" - with black lights, rock music, and all that. I've never been, but I heard it's pretty crazy (probably not suitable for kids younger than 13).
- Springville (AKA: Art City USA) has a fantastic art museum with a Kincaid original.
- Provo is home to Seven Peaks Resort - the best waterpark in all of Utah/Idaho/Montana/Wyoming/Northern Nevada/Western Colorado/Northern Arizona. The swimwear can be shockingly provocative during the afternoon hours, so I would be prepared to shield the eyes of your youngters. But the attractions at this resort are nothing short of remarkable. There is a pool that generates waves akin to the ocean (they call it "The Wave Pool"). There is a narrow, winding waterway they call the "Lazy River". There are several kiddie pools and splash areas. And there are many, many slides ranging from mild to insanely thrilling.
- Many tourists like to "hike the Y", which offers a great view of gorgeous Utah Lake and the valley.
- There's the Monte L. Bean natural science museum on campus, with hundreds of stuffed animals and the state's largest butterfly collection.
- If you ask around campus you can probably catch the infamous "tunnel singers" as they put on a free show of vocal awesomeness. They take requests, so if you have a favorite hymn, chances are they know it. They also do folk music like "If I Had a Hammer". If he happens to be performing, ask for Pocatello Paul to sing "In the Hollow of Thy Hand" in his falsetto. Again...sheer vocal awesomeness.
- Sundance is always a beautiful drive (about 30 minute drive), but the eating and entertainment there are VERY expensive.
- Park City is a ski resort town that brings in tourists and celebrities the whole world over. This really isn't my style (a very liberal feeling, lots of bars), but many people really like Park City.
- There's a dollar theater (Provo Movies 8) that is both economical and fun (though it infuriates me to no end that movies are $1.50, yet they still refer to is as a "dollar theater").
- If the weather is good, many locals like to "float the Provo". You can rent an inner tube and jump in the river up around Heber City and then float downstream. Water temp this time of year is approximately 40 degrees.
- Temple Square in SLC is a "must see". It's a 45-60 minute drive from campus, but well worth the drive. (Try the Lion House rolls...mmmmmmmm)
- If you are going to be in town for a while, I would HIGHLY recommend you drive south to St. George (or as the locals call it, "Dixie"). Dixie has hot weather and a lot of rocks.
- Go to the beach. Yes, you heard me right - you can get that saltwater air right here in Utah on the banks of the Great Salt Lake. Bring your swimsuit and literally float on a bed of salt as you listen to the gulls and waves.
- If sun/water is your thing, you might also opt for the closer Utah Lake. Just 10 minutes from BYU campus, Utah Lake is a shallow, warm lake that is making major efforts to filter out sewage and reduce the number of carp. This is a great local spot to go for a dip, cast a line, pop a few Shasta's, and simply enjoy the outdoors.
- McNaughton Art Gallery (at Towne Centre Mall). I know this is technically part of the mall, but this gallery deserves to be mentioned alone. McNaughton is a local Utah artist now known throughout the Republican Party. His art usually makes a religious or political statement (often combined), and if you are interested in either topic, this gallery is a MUST SEE.

*** Update *** BY FAR the best deal in town is the "Pass of all Passes". Prices fluctuate weekly, but for a cost between $9 - $29 you can purchase this pass that gets you a year pass to Seven Peaks, Trafalga, and dozens of other venues. If you are considering a return trip to Utah in the next year, this pass is a no-brainer.
*** Update *** I was informed by a CBer that the tunnel singers perform around sunset every day except Sunday. They congregate at the bell tower for opening prayer and disperse from there, so ask directions and plan to be there about sunset.


What to pack:
- Weather is usually nice this time of year, but if you're headed to the mountains you'll probably want to bring a jacket, as it cools down in the evenings. You shouldn't need anything heavier...just plan to dress casual.
- You might want to bring a poncho - as September weather sometimes brings some unexpected and unpredictable rain. (If packing light, you can always borrow a poncho from Cabela's.)
- One additional suggestion: Bring an extra suitcase so you have room for your Utah souvenirs. Vacationers to Utah will want to take home a scentsy candle or two, some saltwater toffee, a few BYU shirts, some essential oils, a picture of the Salt Lake Temple, and perhaps a doggy bag from The Brick Oven.


Gameday:
- Get there early. Traffic is at the peak mid-way through the first quarter, so don't be late!
- BYU is famous for our "Cougar Dogs". It's sort of like a really long hot dog, but just a little different. Give it a try and you'll thank me.
- There is no alcohol or caffeine allowed anywhere on campus...don't even try to smuggle it in. This isn't the University of Utah!!
- BYU admin does not allow you to bring outside food/drink into the stadium. If you have a cooler, you can't bring it in - sorry...ridiculous policy.
- Security will check your bag/purse as you enter the stadium, but I've stuffed food and drink in my pants and under my shirt and security has never confronted me. Act confident and stay loose.
- Prior to kickoff, it is our tradition to play our school's fight song and Alma Mater hymn (The latter is considered sacred and should be sung with reverence and in vibrato). We also like to be like Notre Dame by playing your school fight song. Stand up and sing proud! There will be no judgement or heckling on our part.
- During a critical moment of the game and when you hear the Hawaii 5-0 music, watch the crowd and join in by standing up at just the right moment. We call it "the wave". Hard to explain, but you'll catch on quickly.
- When there's a break in the action, we sometimes have a contest to see which side of the stadium is the loudest. Don't be alarmed when it happens - just cover your ears and join in. It can be deafening.


That's all I can think of. If you have questions hit me up on cougarboard or feel free to email me at rulds2@aol.com. Hope you have a GREAT visit to Provo!