Well...this is pretty embarrassing, and I'm sure it'll get some witty replies, but hey, we're all friends here, right?
Not sure if this is the right category, but I'll change if I need to.
According to T-Mobile, someone went into a T-Mobile store today and presented a fake id and got a new sim card for my phone number. They changed my password for several accounts, but I didn't get a notification from T-Mobile for about half an hour (after they changed my sim card back). I didn't notice the email notifications about password changes until I was on the phone with T-Mobile and then checked my email. These kind gentlemen (or ladies) accessed two cryptocurrency accounts as well. Somehow they were able to access my Google authenticator and changed my password on those accounts. I haven't been able to access them yet, but I expect they have been drained, and the amount was considerable.
You guys are welcome to tell me I'm an idiot or try to make me feel better. Jokes are welcome.
Also, it's my birthday.