The waitress told me..sorry for your wait..I said..how rude, you calling me fat?

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May 16, 2022
9:14:11pm

Squirt All-American

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Squirt

Previous username: squirtdog
Bio page: Squirt
Joined: Mar 17, 2005
Last login: May 17, 2024
Total posts: 26,281 (17 FO)

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Messages

Author

Time

What do you call a cow with a twitch?

Ragnar Danneskjold $4,000,000 never forget

5/16/22 8:14pm

What do you call a cow with two legs?

sethj250

5/16/22 8:15pm

What do you call a cow with no legs?

sethj250

5/16/22 8:16pm

Doh!

Magathis

5/16/22 8:16pm

RE: Doh!

sethj250

5/16/22 8:18pm

What do you call a dog with no legs?

sethj250

5/16/22 8:17pm

RE: What do you call a dog with no legs?

1984coug

5/16/22 9:47pm

What do you call a cow stuck on a barbed wire fence?

stoils

5/16/22 9:29pm

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Magathis

5/16/22 8:16pm

What do you call a cow with three legs?

Jelly Man

5/16/22 8:35pm

What do you call a cow with one leg?

Jelly Man

5/16/22 8:35pm

What happens when you make fun of Aggie fans

cougaman

5/16/22 8:47pm

Depends. If it’s the two legs in the same side you’re right. If it’s the two

blueaussie

5/16/22 8:50pm

Your mom

AZPTCOUG

5/16/22 8:54pm

Dad? Is that you?

sethj250

5/16/22 9:11pm

Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

Sparkling Delirium

5/16/22 8:15pm

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs by the front door?

BYUFootballisBack

5/16/22 8:19pm

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean?

BYUFootballisBack

5/16/22 8:19pm

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves?

BYUFootballisBack

5/16/22 8:19pm

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean?

sethj250

5/16/22 8:19pm

D'oh!

sethj250

5/16/22 8:20pm

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on the wall?

BYUFootballisBack

5/16/22 8:20pm

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who likes to water ski?

RC-1138

5/16/22 8:36pm

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting in a hole?

Courtimedes

5/16/22 8:49pm

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting in a smaller hole?

Courtimedes

5/16/22 8:50pm

What do you call him if he rolls in to the hole?

DiamondMo

5/16/22 8:50pm

I think that one's Phil

BYUFootballisBack

5/16/22 9:39pm

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who gets thrown over a wall?

Beggar

5/16/22 9:30pm

What do you call his arms and legs?

TJ06

5/16/22 9:36pm

Man with no arms and no legs on the grill?

PCCoug

5/16/22 10:04pm

What do you call a man no arms and no legs flying over a wall

Marc Spector

5/17/22 4:41am

What do you call a man no arms and no legs sitting in a mailbox

Marc Spector

5/17/22 4:42am

What do you call a man no arms and no legs on the ground under a drunk guy

Marc Spector

5/17/22 4:42am

What do you call a man no arms and no legs sitting on a barber's floor

Marc Spector

5/17/22 4:52am

Unlike most dad jokes, these are actually hilarious

ByuImaginesDragons

5/17/22 8:22pm

When does a joke become a dad joke?

IGotGoodGifs

5/16/22 8:20pm

Why can’t anyone but dads tell dad jokes?

stoils

5/16/22 9:31pm

What is the difference between a duck?

sethj250

5/16/22 8:21pm

One leg is both the same

Magathis

5/16/22 8:22pm

Ha! First person I've ever seen tell that joke who isn't me. Well done.

NewYorkCougar

5/16/22 10:05pm

That’s my wife’s family’s answer. My dad holds up 2 fingers fairly lose together

NYC and Japan

5/16/22 11:08pm

What do you call Black, White and Red all over?

JohnnyC

5/16/22 8:26pm

A penguin in a blender

Magathis

5/16/22 8:27pm

A Sunburned Zebra

cougarfanatic

5/16/22 8:39pm

Why did Han Solo not like his steak?

CouchPotato

5/16/22 8:26pm

RE: Why did Han Solo not like his steak?

sethj250

5/16/22 8:28pm

Can't top that, but here goes. What do a bicycle and a duck have in common?

LifeLongLakerFan

5/16/22 8:31pm

What's brown and sounds like a bell?

jdub

5/16/22 8:34pm

What did master yoda say when he saw himself on a 4k tv?

buckeyecougarguy

5/16/22 8:36pm

Why don’t you take a Pokémon in the bathroom?

O Gaucho

5/16/22 8:37pm

What's brown and sticky?

sethj250

5/16/22 8:39pm

What’s blue and sticky?

Magathis

5/16/22 8:43pm

what's brown and sits on a piano bench?

cougarim

5/17/22 12:41am

Why can’t a nose be 12 inches long?

A Drew Aitch

5/16/22 8:42pm

What's the internal temperature of a Tauntaun?

FabLabCougar

5/16/22 8:42pm

What is a pirate’s favorite letter?

cougfanblue

5/16/22 8:44pm

sethj250

5/16/22 8:52pm

ARRRR

cougaman

5/16/22 8:53pm

In pirate’s voice: “You’d think it be arrrrr, but he really loves the sea.”

cougfanblue

5/16/22 9:04pm

One of my favs right there. “No! It be the sea!”

Lalau

5/16/22 9:22pm

How much did the pirate charge for corn?

sethj250

5/16/22 9:12pm

I asked an elderly pirate, "are you old?" And he said,

Courtimedes

5/16/22 8:55pm

Where did the pirate captain say his buccaneers were?

DiamondMo

5/16/22 9:01pm

What did the pirate cptn say when asked why his belt buckle looked like a wheel?

DiamondMo

5/16/22 9:42pm

Why did the Monkey Fall out of the Tree?

curls

5/16/22 8:56pm

Why did the girl fall out of the tree?

NewYorkCougar

5/16/22 10:22pm

I once had a dream I was in an ocean of orange soda.

Courtimedes

5/16/22 9:00pm

It's really in bad taste to make a dad joke if you aren't a Dad.

Courtimedes

5/16/22 9:01pm

Why was six afraid of seven?

JohnnyComeLately

5/16/22 9:06pm

I hate elevator jokes

Negative Equity

5/16/22 9:06pm

I used to hate elevator jokes

Negative Equity

5/16/22 9:08pm

Some elevator jokes make me angry

Negative Equity

5/16/22 9:10pm

The waitress told me..sorry for your wait..I said..how rude, you calling me fat?

Squirt

5/16/22 9:14pm

What do the movies Titanic and The Sixth Sense have in common?

Beest

5/16/22 9:15pm

How do you convert a Satanist?

Holy Driver

5/16/22 9:17pm

What's brown and rhymes with snoop?

IAmSpartyCoug

5/16/22 9:25pm

Why did they ban round hay bales in Montana?

niqmadu

5/16/22 9:35pm

Milk shake

Lamby3804

5/16/22 9:37pm

Why can’t dinosaurs clap?

LaVellIfIKnow

5/16/22 9:39pm

Ask me if I'm a truck.

NewYorkCougar

5/16/22 10:24pm

What did the clock do when it was hungry?

mcnasty

5/16/22 10:30pm

Did you hear about the new corduroy pillows?

mcnasty

5/16/22 10:32pm

I told my mother in law she drew her eyebrows on too high

mcnasty

5/16/22 10:33pm

Why did the blind lady fall into the well?

Cougs4Lfe

5/16/22 11:45pm

So what if I can't spell Armageddon...

cougarim

5/17/22 12:44am

There was a big moron and a little moron hanging on a fence, but the big one fell off. Why didn't the little one

Marc Spector

5/17/22 4:48am

What did the momma tomato say to the baby tomato when it fell behind?

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