My MIL, bless her heart, won’t read “swears” in the scriptures

Jan 18, 2021
10:44:25pm

HRCougar All-American

The very powers of heck would shake if all men were like Moroni.

Dangnation is an amazing word.

I think she even substitutes whore.

Family scripture time is fun.

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HRCougar

Previous username: rnormangardner
Bio page: HRCougar
Joined: Nov 22, 2004
Last login: Jun 16, 2024
Total posts: 12,910 (1,911 FO)

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Messages

Author

Time

I knew a guy who wouldn’t say or write the word “hello” because it contained

LaVellIfIKnow

1/18/21 9:08pm

We had a family in my ward that removed the coffee cards from Pit.

MarkWatney

1/18/21 9:10pm

Wait a minute, there's supposed to be coffee cards? I'm going to have to talk

DeekLyfter

1/18/21 9:48pm

When was coffee one of the Pit commodities? I've played a lot of Pit in my day,

Pickett

1/18/21 9:59pm

Did you know you used to be in Mark Watney’s ward?

(Private)

1/18/21 10:08pm

This may be a joke over the head moment, but after the original and before the recent re-release, coffee was one of the

MarkWatney

1/18/21 10:27pm

I just looked it up on Wikipedia. I must have always played with a "classic"

Pickett

1/18/21 10:31pm

The classic edition had the best bell. Very satisfying to slam that orange bell.

MarkWatney

1/18/21 10:41pm

Having corn and coffee in a game of pit is confusing

MC Coug Blue

1/19/21 10:25am

RE: I knew a guy who wouldn’t say or write the word “hello”

SpotOnOpinionsGuy

1/18/21 9:13pm

RE: I knew a guy who wouldn’t say or write the word “hello”

Cougarrr

1/18/21 9:13pm

The "pants too tight jar" is pretty funny

SUAVO

1/18/21 9:19pm

Ever ridden in a heckicopter?

whirl

1/18/21 9:16pm

Hey no!

CougarThug

1/18/21 10:02pm

We would NEVER call it that. We said Damnacopter. True story.

Geldir

1/19/21 8:24pm

I had a mission companion from Italy who wouldn’t eat anything Coca Cola flavored. I offered him something one time and

Nuke

1/18/21 9:16pm

eh, some people take things differently. If it doesn't hurt me I don't crap

SUAVO

1/18/21 9:18pm

Thank you for censoring your post

TNT

1/18/21 9:19pm

Posturing to be a mod someday

SUAVO

1/18/21 9:27pm

Wait your turn!

TNT

1/18/21 9:51pm

RE: Wait your turn!

SUAVO

1/18/21 11:07pm

RE: I knew a guy who wouldn’t say or write the word “hello”

El Fuego

1/18/21 9:19pm

I bet he grew up to be a fine internet sports board developer and moderator

YIsForBrigham

1/18/21 9:19pm

Yep...he grew up to be El Jefe

BlooCoog

1/18/21 10:10pm

My dad made us call Godzilla "Monsterzilla." True story.

Loon to the Moon

1/18/21 9:19pm

RE: My dad made us call Godzilla "Monsterzilla." True story.

El Fuego

1/18/21 9:23pm

Gojira would have been more appropriate

TwinsRight

1/18/21 9:26pm

He would have never made it on a mission to Japan and had to say that he "knew"

Division Bell

1/18/21 9:41pm

Mom made us call him Gunzilla

chazen

1/19/21 11:13am

Did you have an alternative name for the damage he created also?

Q-grr

1/19/21 2:52pm

What do you call a giant lizard attacking SLC?

libertycoug

1/19/21 8:10pm

Did he complete his assignments?

ponys

1/18/21 9:22pm

Did he ever visit Hoover Dam?

ponys

1/18/21 9:23pm

My family is very conservative/no swear. But we told tons of dam jokes

ByuImaginesDragons

1/18/21 9:45pm

I used to workout at The Dam Gym in North Bonneville, Wa.

CougarThug

1/18/21 10:06pm

Would he read Othello? Did he play cello? Would he wear a helmet? Listen to seashells?

TwinsRight

1/18/21 9:24pm

Even if this wasn’t a BYU board I would assume the guy was lds.

Jay Rick

1/18/21 9:28pm

Don't assume anything around him...

seco03

1/18/21 9:31pm

To you and me, both.

Q-grr

1/19/21 12:05am

He obviously became a mod here.

Division Bell

1/18/21 9:36pm

There was an elder in our mission who was so by the book

Carnac

1/18/21 9:36pm

My MTC companion was like that. Now he’s an anti/exmo artist. Complete 180

nc-puma

1/18/21 9:46pm

I was worried that might happen in this guy's case

Carnac

1/18/21 10:16pm

He might have had Scrupilosity...aka “religious ocd”. If so I feel super bad

ColonelMustard

1/19/21 6:37am

RE: I knew a guy who wouldn’t say or write the word “hello” because it contained

cougarsnooty

1/18/21 9:45pm

Wow, this thread is just bringing back the crazy memories. I went to

Loon to the Moon

1/18/21 10:35pm

Wow. Just wow. So did he not read the BOM because it says Hell? 🤷🏻‍♀️😂

ByuImaginesDragons

1/18/21 9:47pm

I had a mission companion who would censor the "swears" in the scriptures. He

fredgarvin

1/18/21 10:44pm

LOL man I thought my fam was conservative 😂

ByuImaginesDragons

1/18/21 11:00pm

Reminds me of this really odd family in my ward growing up.

Narfin'Coug

1/18/21 9:58pm

I am sure I scarred some of our priests in our ward, some maybe for life

NorthernCougar

1/18/21 10:29pm

Mom the bishop’s going to .... NVM. Going to the corner to handout

Q-grr

1/19/21 9:00pm

Give ‘em Hey, Brigham, Give ‘Em Hey

JohnnyComeLately

1/18/21 10:40pm

My MIL, bless her heart, won’t read “swears” in the scriptures

HRCougar

1/18/21 10:44pm

Oh you left us hanging. I have to know her replacement to whore.

jordbyu

1/19/21 6:13pm

I mean once someone handed out Pepsi in high school class once

ByuImaginesDragons

1/18/21 11:04pm

Pepsi is the devil's juice.

Updating...

1/19/21 11:43am

Well then I guess I’ve sold my soul because I like Pepsi better!!

ByuImaginesDragons

1/20/21 11:03pm

My daughter says the same thing about hello. She's 6

fattycoug

1/18/21 11:40pm

I just know some CB standup comedian is furiously taking screenshots of this thread.

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