They live in a neighboring state about 5 or 6 hours drive away. I reported to him directly for about 5 years before a layer got put between us. My current direct supervisor is in his same office and has been covering for him during this rough patch. I've met his wife maybe three times?

My supervisor has been acting as a PR rep for my boss. Answering questions and giving updates so he doesn't have to constantly be talking about it.

While his wife was sick, I asked my supervisor how I could help or what I can do. She said he is kind of private with it and didn't want a whole lot of attention so not to do anything really. I'd probably be the same way.

So now to the dilemma. Obviously there will be a funeral. Do I go? Do I send flowers? Do I just give him privacy? If it were me, I'd probably want to keep my work world and private world separate, but it also seems disrespectful to not do anything.

Thoughts? Anyone else deal with this?