to pay a large commission to get her house.

Insofar as her listing your home, remember that she represents her broker and not just herself. 3% of the 6% would go to the buyer agent. So even if you work with a flat fee broker, you're often paying about 5% to sell your home. If you go the for sale by owner route, the buyer may expect a discount which may not save you much money in the long run. The realtor that you talked with should be willing to list your home for 5%: 3% for the buyer agent, 1% for the broker, 1% for her to market/sell/paperwork, etc. (numbers approximate).