But the common reason they seem to have is that once women get married they add weight and they are aftaid to date someone who already has added that weight as they have seen so many if their friends or relative plump up too much after the wedding or kids.

It's shallow no doubt, but I think many 20 something's men are way too shallow for some of the good women that are out there to date. Physical traits fade, but a good personality and self confidence are hard to find in a potential spouse. Don't let a little extra padding keep you from someone who you will love being around for a long time. And if that extra is in the right places, all the better.