to negatively impact a young man’s experience in sports.

Anyone with extensive experience in youth sports will tell you no matter where you go, there are always those dads who have to be the coach. Doesn’t matter the sport or season, these types always find themselves in charge, cause they know better of course.

My dad was this type and several of my buddies dads were as well. For this reason, I know it when I see it and it’s the reason I’ve never coached my kids.

These types are very competitive, have lots of ego and despite not being able to admit it... it is largely about them and living their own dreams through their sons.

These types use phrases like “giving back to the community” (cause the community couldn’t survive without them coaching every sport/season) and other things like “teaching the young men life lessons”. I’ve witnessed these speeches and conversations thousands of times.

There are legit has beens and never was’s (sp?). In my experience, these types are almost always never was’s. Ironically I’ve found that most guys with actual athletic accomplishment stay in the background and let the never was ego guys coach.

I witnessed two fantastic “life lessons” from these coaches yesterday:

Scenario 1:

Competitive youth baseball. Coach with big ego organizes a pitching drill by handing out socks with baseballs in the bottom. Big ego coach shows them to hold the open end of sock and to then use the throwing motion and hit their partners glove with the portion of the sock with the baseball in it while the partner cringes and winces about 4 feet across from the pitcher, praying to not get hit. Big ego coach provides a demonstration... In the demo, he hits a young man above his wrist with the baseball (displaying how stupid and dangerous this is). He turns to the boys like it’s a sketch comedy impersonating a dumb jock coach and tells the boys to not hit their partner, and if they hit their partner in the head they will all do 150 push-ups and run laps.

I then watch very uncomfortable scared kids try desperately to not hit their friends with the ball. It was cringeworthy and I thought, this is easily the dumbest drill I’ve ever witnessed in 30+ yrs of sports experience.

Big ego coach #2 sees what’s going on and scrambles over... “what the #### are you boys doing!?! Do you wanna crack someone’s head open?!!... He continues to scold the boys while they all just took it without uttering a word. He then shows that you hold the baseball and hit your partners glove with the open end sock portion.

Ego coach #1 was within an ear shot and turned his head to the commotion. I thought, oh ok, this is when he says “oh, hey coach, that’s my bad... I instructed them to do it that way, I apologize”. Nope, he hustles over to the boys... “what are you boys doing? Now, do it right!!!”

SMH

Scenario 2:

I have a son who plays rec league basketball. Think tee-ball. This is an awful display of b-ball where kids just play to have fun, entirely different than comp b-ball. Sons team had zero subs while the opposing team had 3.

Well, the opposing team coach who’s the type described above runs a full court press the jump. By Q2 of this bad news bears display of b-ball his team it up 15+ still running a full court press. By the Q4 they are up by 30 or so and he’s still got the full court press on till the very end. Not only embarrassing the kids but making it awkward for all watching.

Look, I’m not an everyone gets a trophy guy, but rec league youth basketball running a full court press? Really?

This was just yesterday. I see these types of examples nearly every practice and game. I rarely if ever even comment to my wife and just laugh in my head cause these big ego coaches have always been around and always will be. I just hope that people stop pretending that these types are providing a service to the community cause I can promise you they wouldn’t have it any other way. Their pride is too great to let anyone else be in charge.