Here's my thinking. I don't think we should take sportsmanship out of sports, and I'm not any kind of psychologist, so this is mainly my knee-jerk reaction, and some experience from both watching highly skilled players, and much lesser skilled players in youth sports.

There are competitive and non-competitive sports. If you are playing a rec league or YMCA whatever, fine, gather round after the game to shake hands, or sing Kumbaya... These are "just a game" leagues, and learning and having fun is the objective. Once players cross into "competitive" sport, the game changes a little. Again, we don't need to get rid of sportsmanship altogether, but I do think what we expect should be different.

I would think that it makes more sense for the teams to do whatever hand shaking they will do, and wishing of good luck or whatever, at the BEGINNING of the contest. During the game, emotions run so high... lots of trash-talking probably going on, on field physical altercations, etc. There is a winner who is reveling, maybe gloating, and there is a loser, who is reeling in the loss.

The players should be expected to take responsibility to maintain their composure before the contest... After it is over, just let those who have these high emotions separate themselves, and take whatever time they need to process. Maybe just walk off, maybe they want to stay out on the field and high-five or congratulate or whatever.

But essentially forcing all the players into some forced pseudo-semblance sportsmanship really doesn't do anyone any real good, but it does let high emotion with low emotional intelligence mix.