Life was good--all the stresses of COVID had mostly resolved for me and my family: career and income were humming along at all-time highs, kids were doing well, we'd had a blast over the summer, and I was just hitting my stride in my calling and in dadding.

Then, one day at a business lunch, I had a crazy dizzy spell and couldn't maintain a train of thought for a few minutes. I thought I'd had a stroke.

Over the next few weeks I had a few more bouts that largely resolved, so I chalked it up to something COVID related.

Then finally one day, I woke up and couldn't shake the overwhelming sense of dread. It was the same kind of physiological reaction you have to nightmares sometimes. But I couldn't shake it or reason my way out of it.

Turns out, my family has a pretty extensive history of anxiety setting in in our 30s. I have an older sister and at least two aunts on my Mom's side who all deal with it. Same symptoms, same lack of triggers. Just generalized anxiety disorder. Lost the genetic lottery on that one, I guess.

Luckily, my sister and aunts were able to clue me in to how they treat it--a low daily dose of venlafaxine (Effexor), talk therapy when necessary (I go ~ once a month), consistent and vigorous exercise (weight training for me), and making sure I take care of myself (among other things, I get a regular massage because bad muscle tension is one of the worst symptoms for my anxiety).

It was a terrible couple of months in late 2020 / early 2021, but I'm in such a better place now.

Whatever you're feeling, it's legitimate. Whatever the causes, it doesn't matter. But take hope that you can learn how to manage and treat it and overcome it. You may not feel that way right now, but you can do it.

Go meet with your primary care physician and start looking into therapy options.