It is a term that you don't hear much any more, but a generation ago was very common. It is slowly leaving the lexicon.

I remember using it all the time. We also played "smear the queer." Kids don't call it that any more. I remember friends calling others "jews" if they were cheap. These were people who probably had never met a Jewish person.

I bet two generations ago, the "n" word was fairly prevalent, even casually among people who didn't mean any harm.

My point is that these terms all seem to be fading away, which is good. Hang in there, have patience, forgive, and be a good example.

For the record, I have an adopted son who is retarded as well. He doesn't have downs syndrome, but he is legally retarded as measured by IQ. Fetal Alcohol Syndrome.