So there is only one CORRECT response.

Oct 23, 2019
4:18:59pm

Archaea All-American

Leaning over and saying softly, "you are probably unaware, but my child has Down's Syndrome," would be incorrect? Would it not have caused him to reconsider which slur he uses next time?

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Archaea

Bio page: Archaea
Joined: Mar 28, 2001
Last login: May 1, 2024
Total posts: 93,704 (3,089 FO)

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Messages

Author

Time

How should I have reacted?

Garn

10/21/19 10:51pm

That one of those times it’s perfectly acceptable to

The Dude Abides

10/21/19 11:00pm

I agree but add that he makes a point that the officials sucked

travelcoug

10/22/19 4:09am

That’s why I simply boo or yell “you suck ref”

idcougarfan

10/22/19 5:08am

I think the "suck" part of that term has nothing to do with suckling babies

Carnac

10/22/19 5:55am

One might argue that saying "the refs suck" could be even more offensive

Acorn

10/22/19 6:10am

This is a good reminder that words may mean something different

Carnac

10/22/19 7:19am

^this

rggee

10/22/19 7:23am

it is interesting. because even the word dumb is referring to a person with a

ColonelMustard

10/22/19 5:38pm

I think it's interesting the power people give to words, emphasis on give

rcbyufan

10/22/19 5:49pm

'Dumb' 'lame' 'stupid' etc

rggee

10/22/19 10:01pm

Reminds me of sitting at an away game at Airforce.

ditch

10/22/19 12:16pm

<< Deleted >>

Jizosh

10/22/19 8:16am

not sure it'll make a difference until they have a similar experience to yours

byujdmba

10/21/19 11:01pm

Great thought. It really is true that unless

Uncle Bluto

10/21/19 11:35pm

One can have empathy, without experience.

TheHop

10/22/19 8:15am

As a health care provided in a field that often works with those with

akmewg

10/21/19 11:43pm

<< Deleted >>

rivercitycoug

10/21/19 11:53pm

The above thoughts are far better than mine,

Betruewhiteandblue

10/22/19 12:10am

While not right, people have their free agency. It wasn't directed at you or...

Big McLargeHuge

10/22/19 12:45am

I tell my kids all the time no matter what you are people will mock you and

Osteotome

10/22/19 1:22am

I just quietly remind them that what they said wasn't appropriate, and suggest

Nogi-oshi

10/22/19 4:45am

He who is offended when no offense is intended is a fool.

lilpenny

10/22/19 5:43am

Reminds me of the Spencer W. Kimball story about the orderly.

game.blouses

10/22/19 6:41am

If President Kimball was under anesthesia, how did he even hear the orderly?

UberDeek

10/23/19 12:13am

He shouldn’t be mad but I don’t see any reason for him to not say, “I don’t like

puntersarepeople

10/22/19 7:23am

There is much much worse yelled at a football venue. Just let it go.

rggee

10/22/19 7:25am

That’s what I would do

puntersarepeople

10/22/19 7:26am

That doesn’t make sense to me. Offense was intended.

Cougar Jazz Fan

10/22/19 9:30am

But not meant to offend the OP’s daughter.

lilpenny

10/23/19 4:43am

That still doesn’t make sense to me. The term was used with the intent to offend

Cougar Jazz Fan

10/23/19 11:51pm

It wasn't a term of endearment towrd the ref.

Archaea

10/23/19 4:17pm

That's not accurate. There are words that are offensive and shouldn't be used

palangi

10/22/19 9:36am

what an ignorant comment.

Goliath

10/22/19 9:38am

Because it's extremely offensive and can be damaging to the most vulnerable

Machiavelli

10/22/19 9:43am

It's his response because he uses the word and this is his rationalization.

ditch

10/22/19 12:12pm

Wrong

lilpenny

10/23/19 4:36am

Great.

ditch

10/23/19 2:52pm

He was intending to offend disabled people, so I don't think it works here.

Memmo

10/22/19 10:25am

How do you know that? How do you know the intents of his heart?

lilpenny

10/23/19 4:39am

If your anger at someone causes you to compare them to another person, then

Memmo

10/23/19 4:05pm

That's a dumb saying in this instance.

ditch

10/22/19 11:37am

He who is offended even when offense is intended should consider

supercoco

10/22/19 2:02pm

I think you missed the point of the OP.

Cougar Jazz Fan

10/22/19 4:10pm

I was responding more to the thought about taking offense than the OP

supercoco

10/22/19 6:55pm

He who thinks the OP was about taking offense... Is using his imagination

Goliath

10/22/19 3:00pm

So if I am not black or Jewish and someone in a crowd at BYU sports yells ethnic

Archaea

10/23/19 4:16pm

That must be frustrating

Carnac

10/22/19 5:53am

Do others call your kid retarded?

Acorn

10/22/19 6:06am

You should have yelled at him, "WATCH YOUR MOUTH!" Have him take a look around

demon_llama

10/22/19 6:06am

I disagree with many here. I think you'd be fine to kindly say something.

game.blouses

10/22/19 6:37am

Saying nothing was the correct response

byujag

10/22/19 7:04am

Agreed. It is am emotional moment when these guys are angry

Carnac

10/22/19 7:14am

Saying nothing is fine, but saying hey man can you not say that is 100% ok too

palangi

10/22/19 9:40am

So there is only one CORRECT response.

Archaea

10/23/19 4:18pm

I used to use that word as a teenager all the time. It was just a word. I have

rggee

10/22/19 7:13am

I think it’s appropriate to say something but don’t beat yourself up for not

D.T. Survivor

10/22/19 7:40am

My opinion: you probably did the right thing.

jkccoug

10/22/19 7:43am

I think you should have started a fight,

farmboy

10/22/19 7:43am

I have 2 mentally handicapped brothers, so I'm right there too. I generally let

BlueTooth

10/22/19 7:58am

“You refs are demonstrating unacceptable job performance!”

Croweater

10/22/19 7:59am

I feel u. Close fam w/ disabilities and it's bothersome to hear such language

zerome4sooners

10/22/19 8:02am

It is unfortunate, but it is just a word.

Benfica1

10/22/19 8:20am

Should have told him not to say “freaking” in front of your kids?

PJMort

10/22/19 8:28am

No doubt it's frustrating, but we all choose what to be offended by.

ReggaeCoug

10/22/19 9:08am

You don’t have to take offense to stand up for those around you.

SlantRoute

10/22/19 9:34am

I think you did the right thing letting it go. People grow and learn at their

CougarTailDevourer

10/22/19 9:50am

You were fine. Don’t second guess yourself.

Dr MoBYU

10/22/19 10:08am

Sticks and Stones - best wisdom my Grandfather ever taught me.

OGSuperfan

10/22/19 10:24am

Your Grandpa was a freaking..... GENIUS!

PJMort

10/22/19 10:32am

Let it go?I dont get offended if they say"the refs are blind" its a eupham

CarolinaCoug

10/22/19 1:21pm

Don’t listen to the clowns on here that encourage you to be offended when

Gerald-DeGroot

10/23/19 3:41am

No one encouraged that. Encouraging to correct =/= encouraging to be offended

game.blouses

10/23/19 5:43am

Yeah, but it's more fun to pretend that it was about being offended. That way

Goliath

10/23/19 6:12am

What is there to correct?

CarolinaCoug

10/23/19 3:55pm

Ignorant remarks that are more harmful than many know

game.blouses

10/23/19 5:17pm

It's only harmful because people let it be harmful. Words only have the power

rcbyufan

10/23/19 5:21pm

Why don't you talk to people who have kids with mental disabilities and ask

Goliath

10/23/19 5:48pm

I have. Frankly, I'm more diplomatic about it when speaking face to face but

rcbyufan

10/23/19 6:44pm

Well goodness sakes, they must all feel so much better and enlightened to have

Goliath

10/23/19 7:13pm

I apologize if I upset you. That was not my intention.

rcbyufan

10/23/19 9:33pm

If people choose to ignore it, fine. But for those ignoring it without under-

Archaea

10/23/19 11:57pm

What you said is true and I agree.

game.blouses

10/23/19 6:02pm

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