First, we have 10 kids. We live in Provo.

They are all so different. The oldest is self motivated and grateful making it easy to think we should pay for her and give her opportunities to get ahead, but she's made her plans to work while she's at BYU. She is happy that we are not paying for her school

The 2nd was not a good student, needed a lot of hand holding. She planned to go to BYU-I with some friends, but last minute decided to stay in Provo and go to UVU. She paid her own tuition, but she quit classes half way through and just lost her own money. We are so glad we didn't pay for her! We have had strained relationships with her off and on, pressuring her to "succeed" in schoool. We would have always doubted if we made the wrong decision to pay, or would have put so much more pressure that our relationship would have suffered greatly. With her losing her own money it was a lot easier to let her suffer the consequences of losing her own money.

Our 3rd has been very entitled. She didn't think she could get accepted to BYU, and didn't even apply.
She decided to go to the U and started acting... anti-BYU-ish. She went to the U freshman orientation, planned her classes and realized that she doesn't have enough money. Oh, she had a job, but quit for the summer and spent all but $1000 of her savings. She was sick about it when she realized she didn't have enough $. She said maybe it was meant to be. "Maybe BYU is the Lord's school". She will go to UVU and save money and then transfer to BYU.
WE ARE VERY HAPPY WE DIDN'T PAY FOR THEIR COLLEGE!
The other kids are still in HS and younger.