traditionally. Women have been told, "oh yes, we value you — see, we have secretary appreciation day! You are special! Here, work for peanuts."

While what you said is technically true (self-worth is found outside of money) it is also true that in our society, money is absolutely considered a marker of individual success. It's very natural. You spend 50 hours a week doing something, it represents a lot of your self-identity. Telling someone to ignore this very natural thing is not very helpful.