Have a heart to heart with someone who has done it. Working round the clock with

Jan 24, 2021
11:32:12pm

wisconsincougs All-American

little kids is very very tough.

Done it in stretches and it eats at your soul and is miserable.

And kids don’t understand it at all. They are just sad and resentful of your absence.

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wisconsincougs

Previous username: (Private)
Bio page: wisconsincougs
Joined: Apr 11, 2005
Last login: May 1, 2024
Total posts: 5,723 (625 FO)

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Messages

Author

Time

POLL: $350k vs $190k

Hodor

1/24/21 10:16pm

Making $190k in Utah at age 35? Seems pretty good

TNT

1/24/21 10:17pm

Through a series of lucky events, I found myself in a niche that involves pay

Hodor

1/24/21 10:24pm

Awesome. Kudos. *ahem* (TNT need money please help)

TNT

1/24/21 10:25pm

Hypotheticals are too low. Can’t conceptualize so I didn’t answer.

Salami Karate

1/24/21 10:18pm

How long would you have to keep the new job to make that salary bump? 5 years? Could you then leave and still make

YIsForBrigham

1/24/21 10:18pm

Highly unlikely, at least to a place where the lifestyle is any better.

Hodor

1/24/21 10:20pm

What industry is this?? Do you enjoy what you do?

WP17

1/25/21 10:39am

Unless you have a way to offset it, a lot of your income at $350k starts

BIG XII Coug

1/24/21 10:18pm

That’s a good point. Have to calculate the pros and cons based off take home

Powerbait DPM

1/25/21 5:40pm

Is this a CB humble brag?

letthewookieewin

1/24/21 10:19pm

Textbook

blueaussie

1/24/21 10:46pm

Yep and done beautifully.

BluePassion

1/24/21 11:14pm

Do you have a family and kids? Do you like them? Do you want them to like you?

byubyu

1/24/21 10:20pm

Yes and yes. The worry: men are meant to grow and be challenged. Kids seeing

Hodor

1/24/21 10:21pm

Men are meant to be dads and spend time with their kids as much as possible.

cougstyle

1/24/21 10:23pm

If good enough gets you everything you want, what does the rest matter. You have

TaiJuan

1/24/21 10:24pm

Kids really want time with Dad. Not seeing dad because he is working

JohnnyC

1/24/21 10:26pm

As a kid I never thought about that and I doubt my kids do

Beggar

1/24/21 10:33pm

What kid is evaluating how there parents push themselves at work? I just knew

califcougar

1/24/21 10:38pm

Find side hobbies and things to push yourself... Kids want a relationship not a

BYUFootballisBack

1/24/21 10:41pm

Nothing you haven't heard already - but time w/your kids is invaluable. You may

BlueTooth

1/24/21 10:42pm

This is like the “more time in the office” deathbed hypo in reverse.

Memmo

1/24/21 10:43pm

Feels like your mind is telling you one thing and your heart is the opposite.

Bin01015

1/24/21 10:49pm

here's a thought, then: don't be content to just be a good dad; choose to be a great one; get out of your comfort zone

BYUtiful

1/24/21 11:01pm

My thought on this....career growth doesn’t necessarily equal personal growth.

Kavorka

1/24/21 11:07pm

Not all growth must be professional. Go run triathlons or be a synchronized

ryebrye

1/25/21 5:44am

Well, you’re bound to get one thumbs up on this once HarlemCoug logs in

Nikomedes

1/25/21 6:48am

Why would anyone tell their kids they don't feel challenged at work?

ochobeeguy

1/25/21 11:12am

Having time with kids is more important to th than their bragging rights about

niqmadu

1/25/21 6:40am

$150k difference is a lot of earning potential if invested. That equals earlier

Revolution

1/24/21 10:20pm

Retire in 1/3 the time? Easy for me. Take the new job.

TANK

1/24/21 10:29pm

And miss your kids' younger years? No thanks.

Chasicle

1/24/21 11:11pm

Not worth the sacrifice of time with kids. Kids>more money. Keep the current job

Cougar TD

1/24/21 11:32pm

The difference is only $75k after the divorce.

DiamondMo

1/25/21 8:12am

And much much less than that after taxes eat a large portion

BYUFootballisBack

1/25/21 9:53am

Selling Essential Oils is not that lucrative

Babyboy

1/24/21 10:20pm

Biden or Trump tax brackets?!?!

hebercreeper

1/24/21 10:21pm

Money isn't everything, time is. Spend time with your family, friends, hobbies,

Don_Juan_El_Guapo

1/24/21 10:23pm

Stop shopping around. I will push you harder if you want me to and pay you more if you just help us increase revenue 😉

Trent

1/24/21 10:23pm

How long do the insane work hours last? If it is 2-5 years of being all-in in order to set yourself up for the

Clark Addison

1/24/21 10:24pm

Probably ten more years of grinding at this pace.

Hodor

1/24/21 10:26pm

Then to me that is a coin flip and depends on what you want, and what is important to you.

Clark Addison

1/24/21 10:37pm

Ten years working until 2 AM and no weekends?? Bruh.

WP17

1/25/21 10:26am

See if you can find Church member mentors who took the $1.5M option,

Joe Banks

1/24/21 10:27pm

Almost all divorced at least once. A couple have great families/marriages though

Hodor

1/24/21 10:29pm

There you go! Go in with eyes wide open. Wife needs to be on board.

(Private)

1/24/21 10:48pm

Well it actually sounds like she doesn't need to be since he'll swap her out

ryebrye

1/25/21 5:46am

Sounds like consulting for McKinsey

niqmadu

1/25/21 8:16am

Except most people jump out at 2-3 years. And weekends are free

WP17

1/25/21 10:23am

I’d take the bigger money and retire in 10 years.

JollyGreenGiant

1/24/21 10:29pm

You never said what your wife and family want

BYU4eVeR

1/24/21 10:30pm

They want me to be happy and fulfilled. New job means permanent WFH, which is

Hodor

1/24/21 10:31pm

I keep hearing Me me me.... sound like you need to re-evaluate your family

BYU4eVeR

1/24/21 10:34pm

It’s not a perk when you’re permanently working. The way you described it (2am+,

CrackerJack

1/24/21 10:36pm

Can’t buy happiness

DrinkSuin

1/24/21 10:31pm

But it’s a lot easier to focus on happiness when you’re not worried about rent

WP17

1/25/21 10:29am

The point is the current salary is already waaay more than enough

BYUFootballisBack

1/25/21 11:42am

Yeah, agreed. Especially since he has an upward trajectory

WP17

1/25/21 11:54am

I’m less interested in your situation than what I did wrong in life.

ballen

1/24/21 10:32pm

If you’re content, I’m jealous. Seriously.

Hodor

1/24/21 10:33pm

I do fine and make more than I ever thought I would but it blows my mind how

ballen

1/24/21 10:34pm

Is your company hiring?

LaVellIfIKnow

1/24/21 10:32pm

Dang. TNT could probably be a janitor there and make $110k/year

TNT

1/24/21 10:34pm

They might be depending on the answers to the polls.

Hodor

1/24/21 10:34pm

Don’t assume your quality of life goes down... but go for quality of life.

(Private)

1/24/21 10:45pm

FWIW-A college friend found himself in a similar situation after graduating

m0resn0w

1/24/21 10:46pm

As some have mentioned above your NEEDS to be truly all in. Some truly are happy

Cheap Seats

1/24/21 10:50pm

Your wife...

(Private)

1/24/21 10:51pm

Married? Kids?

Heath Squashwell

1/24/21 10:53pm

Just saw the thread above this. Might be time to reflect on your purpose.

Heath Squashwell

1/24/21 10:54pm

Married. Two kids under six. At least one more in the future.

Hodor

1/24/21 10:56pm

As someone who makes a fraction of what you make, let me say...

Heath Squashwell

1/24/21 11:16pm

When is enough... Enough. More money isn't always with the sacrifice of time.

Cougar TD

1/24/21 11:34pm

Very relatable concerns...

Kavorka

1/24/21 10:56pm

No way i take the money

zephyr

1/24/21 11:07pm

I think too many people are thinking a new job is a forever thing.

jrob30

1/24/21 11:14pm

Potentially without a wife and kids you lost custody of.

Chasicle

1/24/21 11:16pm

Depends What Makes You Happy

Chicago Cougar

1/24/21 11:17pm

Have a heart to heart with someone who has done it. Working round the clock with

wisconsincougs

1/24/21 11:32pm

Six years of I-banking was enough for me. But I do to this day appreciate the learning, professional growth, network, &

Trent

1/25/21 12:14am

Leave it up to your wife

ARCoug

1/25/21 12:14am

Glad it’s working out.. how long have you been in the tougher specialty?

cougfanz

1/25/21 7:55am

If it's more $ you want + quality of life, maybe a side gig could be the answer

Shore10

1/25/21 1:11am

What industry is this?

Jimmertime

1/25/21 3:57am

Get an offer and see what your current employer is willing to do, but be prepare

NacoCoug

1/25/21 5:21am

That’s a hard decision and I know exactly where you’re coming from

hansel

1/25/21 5:37am

The sweet spot to me with is a good balance between making good money and also

brazilcoug

1/25/21 6:40am

People who don’t work nights (with no time off during the day) have no clue how

cougfanz

1/25/21 7:06am

I believe congratulations are in order

HONOMO

1/25/21 9:47am

I enjoy working but it’s not the only thing I enjoy doing. If I don’t have time

Odysseus

1/25/21 9:57am

No weekends and working with people you don’t like for your prime years? 🤮

WP17

1/25/21 10:36am

Sounds like Biglaw? I have been at a NYC firm now for 6 years. It can be brutal.

Pied Piper

1/25/21 11:37am

Why do you continue?

WP17

1/25/21 4:30pm

Big money

Jimmertime

1/25/21 6:17pm

Yes married and kids and in NYC (not right now because of COVID). Yes the money

Pied Piper

1/26/21 8:59am

I recently read an interesting book about this phenomenon/culture

WP17

1/26/21 9:46am

Hard pass on option 2.

machete

1/25/21 3:16pm

At 35 I probably would have taken the money and prestige

PROBcoug

1/25/21 4:11pm

Decide to be among the best in the world at what you no matter who employs you.

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