So, you don't really want ADVICE. You want validation

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Apr 1, 2021
6:59:15pm

fattycoug All-American

So, you don't really want ADVICE. You want validation

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fattycoug

Bio page: fattycoug
Joined: Sep 9, 2002
Last login: May 23, 2024
Total posts: 69,716 (11,114 FO)

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Messages

Author

Time

Need your advise. My 6 year old daughter (who is our most sensitive child) came

Ten_Hour_Drives

4/1/21 5:53pm

I got bullied A LOT as a kid. Like, excessively. For many reasons. I don’t think bullying is good. That said I think you

Slim

4/1/21 5:57pm

I agree about focusing on your own child ... but actually 1st grade bullies

runnincoug

4/1/21 6:40pm

Agreed. This can be resolved at that grade level. And teaching a 1st grader

777

4/1/21 6:53pm

I was always the smallest kid in my class when I was in elementary school

Belboz

4/1/21 7:07pm

80s for me. I was pushed, punched, called names, made fun of for my height, weight, glasses, teeth, religion, poverty

Slim

4/1/21 7:10pm

I think it's different for boys in general. It's probably a lot easier.

Belboz

4/1/21 7:18pm

Geez where did all you guys go to school -Thunder Dome High?

SwanSong

4/1/21 9:03pm

Southern California in the 1980s in an economically disadvantaged community

Slim

4/1/21 9:06pm

I was in So CA too then, maybe an older brother helped indirectly

SwanSong

4/1/21 10:53pm

I didn’t play sports until I got to high school. I tried to sign up for baseball but my parents told me they couldn’t

Slim

4/1/21 10:59pm

Long story short

SwanSong

4/1/21 11:12pm

Umm.. sendimg you a BM

4/2/21 12:13am

That’s kind of gross.

BYU Grounds

4/2/21 1:57pm

I never got into a fight after 6th or 7th grade

Belboz

4/1/21 10:32pm

This was me..80's too tall skinny poor,broken tape glasses, bad hair style

4/1/21 9:45pm

If you were to meet my today you would never guess that I was bullied growing up. But I was. Relentlessly. Which is, in

Slim

4/1/21 9:56pm

I also had taped glasses lol

Slim

4/1/21 10:02pm

It would always dog into my skin on nose or around orbit..ugh!

4/1/21 11:37pm

Same here. I have an athletic physique, became yhe popular kid. Dated

4/1/21 11:36pm

Dwayne is that you?

BYU Grounds

4/2/21 2:00pm

good for you, brother; I'm very sorry to hear what a crappy childhood you had

BYUtiful

4/2/21 12:08am

Have you ever had one of these moments out of the movies where you return your hometown/ HS reunion and all the chicks

RdF3

4/2/21 7:51am

They actually made a movie of Slim’s situation.

IceBlueCoug

4/2/21 8:05am

like a hallmark movie?

Pangare

4/2/21 8:38am

Don't use the strategy my Mom taught of laughing at the bullies. That did not

WhirleyPop

4/1/21 7:09pm

I had a good laugh at one once and it went over very well

Belboz

4/1/21 7:26pm

I bet that teacher was hoping someone would do that for quite a while

Pangare

4/2/21 8:40am

RE: I got bullied A LOT as a kid. Like, excessively. For many reasons. I don’t think bullying is good. That said I

Brisco

4/1/21 7:45pm

If you don’t advocate for her, who will? No one will

WallaX2

4/1/21 5:58pm

As the parent of a bully, I just laugh off those teacher calls. Just FYI.

SJS

4/1/21 6:00pm

I'm sorry are you telling me you don't have a problem with your child bullying

Ten_Hour_Drives

4/1/21 6:05pm

It’s the way the world works, bro.

SJS

4/1/21 6:12pm

If you are trolling then just STOP. This post is serious to me, so don't

Ten_Hour_Drives

4/1/21 6:16pm

Welcome to CB!

SJS

4/1/21 6:19pm

<< Deleted >>

juantoad

4/2/21 5:30pm

If it were me I’d go see the principal or his assistant and skip the teacher.

Bullrider

4/1/21 6:44pm

Uh no. The troll said he's fine with his kid being a bully. Did you know that

Ten_Hour_Drives

4/1/21 6:52pm

You should read this:

SJS

4/1/21 6:57pm

Weird joke or weird life.

Heath Squashwell

4/1/21 6:18pm

Uh no it’s not. It eventually comes back around. Always.

Big Daddy D

4/1/21 9:19pm

Depends on the level of bullying. If it's major physically harming, then yeah

4/1/21 6:13pm

Personally I think you should not feel that's ok and change/repent on this

semisonic

4/1/21 6:46pm

I think the bishop needs to get involved here.

Zaphod

4/1/21 6:54pm

At the very least, someone needs to talk to a manager.

byubyu

4/1/21 7:11pm

Well, I guess we differ. Here's one talk of many from Church leaders:

semisonic

4/1/21 7:27pm

You are too nerdy. No way you have the physical stature to produce a bully.

bulletproof

4/1/21 7:26pm

RE: You are too nerdy. No way you have the physical stature to produce a bully.

SJS

4/1/21 8:03pm

SJS response is why I cant stand people hiding behind a computer.

PizzaPipeline

4/1/21 7:45pm

Agree. This SJS guy is embarrassing himself in this thread

shammy

4/1/21 8:56pm

RE: As the parent of a bully, I just laugh off those teacher calls. Just FYI.

SJS

4/1/21 7:57pm

Which is why I always say a bully needs a punch in the face. They must

Big Daddy D

4/1/21 9:18pm

Here's something to consider. Bullies are usually bigger than their peers

4/7/21 4:14pm

I never had much of a problem with bullies because I made friends with the...

4/7/21 6:17pm

if you find you're not getting enough attention from the school on this. all

Cougarclaw

4/1/21 6:03pm

I thought about this topic of bullying. I was picked on a lot as a kid growing

JohnnyC

4/1/21 6:06pm

When my kids come to me telling me that someone is mistreating them I usually tell them “either do something about it or

Slim

4/1/21 6:08pm

They are in the same class. There is no avoiding this little brat. And for

Ten_Hour_Drives

4/1/21 6:10pm

You’re wrong

Slim

4/1/21 6:11pm

Maybe there are lots of people on here with experience as kids that are more extreme

CSoul

4/1/21 6:13pm

What better age to teach her to fend for herself? Kids this age soak everything

4/1/21 6:15pm

The other girl is also 6 and in 1st grade, no?

John Doe

4/1/21 6:27pm

You assume the bully comes from a normal family situation? Bullies often are

Preppy

4/1/21 6:41pm

And this is exactly why it's okay to let the principle know what's going on. The

777

4/2/21 1:55am

It’s never too young to teach your kid good life skills.

IceBlueCoug

4/1/21 6:42pm

Also, you need to stop referring to the other girl as a brat. You don’t know the whole story.

IceBlueCoug

4/1/21 6:44pm

No i don't. Saying something rude or giving someone dirty looks is one thing,

Ten_Hour_Drives

4/1/21 6:56pm

RE: No i don't. Saying something rude or giving someone dirty looks is one

JohnnyC

4/1/21 7:06pm

Did you daughter get hurt? Did she scrape her knees or bonk her head as a result of being pushed?

IceBlueCoug

4/1/21 7:15pm

Dude she is like 6 or 7. You are way overreacting. Kids push each other all the

Baron

4/1/21 8:39pm

She’s a 6 year old first grade girl. Not a violent criminal.

Kavorka

4/1/21 9:19pm

We are nearly the exact same situation.

Joe

4/1/21 9:22pm

RE: No i don't. Saying something rude or giving someone dirty looks is one

BYU Grounds

4/1/21 9:25pm

So, you don't really want ADVICE. You want validation

fattycoug

4/1/21 6:59pm

No I don't want validation, I want some constructive advise, which many have

Ten_Hour_Drives

4/1/21 7:05pm

We’ve all had children come home sobbing because of how others treated them. Some of us were those kids once

Slim

4/1/21 7:13pm

As a therapist, I'd say teaching your kids how to cope with bullies is actually

fattycoug

4/1/21 7:16pm

You’re a sensitive one

SJS

4/1/21 7:19pm

Every kid since the beginning of time has had to deal with bullies. It’s not new and it’s not going to go away.

IceBlueCoug

4/1/21 7:19pm

Many of us on the board have been in seemingly very similar circumstances.

4/1/21 7:20pm

IDK. I think bullies are brats and I don't like them. Sometimes I sort of

Jay Rick

4/1/21 10:06pm

I'm feeling bullied by your vulgarity...

jaromp

4/1/21 9:59pm

Dude, the "little brat" is also a first grader. Take your own advice.

Byron McNertney

4/1/21 8:30pm

There is a good chance the little brat has been abused. If you work

regularfan

4/1/21 8:57pm

Alright, this crossed a line. You didn't get the advice you want so you tell

Vincent's Picks

4/2/21 10:46am

I was also bullied daily in elementary school. It didn't stop until I stood up

Adwight

4/1/21 6:21pm

And there's video of the incident!

byubyu

4/1/21 6:25pm

Something like that ;).

Adwight

4/1/21 6:27pm

Have you watched the Irishman?

HookEmCoug

4/1/21 6:09pm

Sadly my experience is that it’s next to impossible to stop bullying. Talking to

mudpupper

4/1/21 6:10pm

Try to help reduce it, but also teach her how to deal with it. I had glasses since I was 2 years old and

CSoul

4/1/21 6:10pm

Sign her up for Brazilian Jiu Jitsu.

Zedhead

4/1/21 6:11pm

I can hear my wife screaming "Krav Maga!" right now

4/1/21 6:16pm

I think you may be overreacting and I recommend a different approach.

garyfan

4/1/21 6:17pm

Yep, 10-hr is in the right, but overreacting in a counterproductive way. Needs to take a deep breath before continuing.

ColoSpgs

4/1/21 6:43pm

Worry about the lessons taught to the daughter thnking she's incapable of resolving conflict without adult interferance.

Soupie

4/1/21 9:55pm

Depending on your level of crazy, you could call the bully’s parent.

Heath Squashwell

4/1/21 6:21pm

Was your grandpa a Hatfield or a McCoy?

4/1/21 6:34pm

My sons were bullied a bit in elementary school. They are twins and both

USMCdad

4/1/21 6:21pm

My dad grew up in San Francisco. When he was a boy, a group of boys ganged up

4/1/21 6:39pm

Is this your dad?

4/1/21 7:40pm

My dad looked more like Sean Connery, but you have the idea.

4/1/21 7:43pm

Wait, 6 year olds pushing and shoving and giving dirty looks is bullying now?

jrob30

4/1/21 6:41pm

I hate that. Kids start out so sweet and good and it sucks seeing them learn

Backcountry

4/1/21 6:44pm

<< Deleted >>

OPINIONS

4/1/21 6:47pm

You have every right to protect your child. I just caution that if you meet the

58DCougar

4/1/21 6:52pm

Teach your kid to stand up for themselves and maybe even how to fight. I didn't

Ash

4/1/21 6:54pm

I don’t hate many things. Yellow mustard. Pickles. Bullies.

Jay Rick

4/1/21 6:58pm

Mustard? Pickles? Now I hate YOU.

4/1/21 7:00pm

I know. My wife and son both love mustard and pickles. I literally gag at the

Jay Rick

4/1/21 7:45pm

That's unfortunate.

4/1/21 8:23pm

Pickles? What kind of sick monster are you?

John Doe

4/1/21 7:15pm

I would follow both helping to curb the bullying and helping your child cope

semisonic

4/1/21 6:59pm

Verbal is one thing. When they lay their hands on your child that's another

777

4/1/21 6:59pm

This helped me understand bullying in ways I hadn’t before:

HamsterCoug

4/1/21 7:35pm

At first, I thought this was a joke, but these guys make some points via HP

BringYourUltimate

4/2/21 8:22am

Mandated Church leadership training on protecting children and youth

semisonic

4/1/21 7:41pm

OK. I want to thank those of you that shared some good constructive advise, and

Ten_Hour_Drives

4/1/21 7:45pm

Im sorry for those who weren't compassionate for your circumstance and child

semisonic

4/1/21 7:52pm

There was some weird subthread here but the other stuff you called garbage was

fattycoug

4/1/21 7:53pm

I think you missed some of the truly unhelpful posts There definitely were some.

semisonic

4/1/21 7:55pm

Didn't miss them. But the OP specifically called out very sound advice as such

fattycoug

4/1/21 7:57pm

We take bullying seriously but based on your responses we don't take you serious

Champ Kind

4/1/21 8:48pm

RE: OK. I want to thank those of you that shared some good constructive advise,

4/1/21 8:48pm

Fine, but dude, it's "advice." Grammar nazis can't take you seriously either

Ash

4/2/21 6:06am

Thank you, Ash. I almost pulled the trigger three times on that point.

Smack

4/3/21 6:44pm

The ironic thing here is that many of us remember being bullied, but don't

andrewth

4/1/21 8:22pm

I wouldn't over-estimate what the teacher can actually do

StantonMac

4/1/21 8:34pm

Thank you. I agree. Several people that actually took my post seriously DM'd

Ten_Hour_Drives

4/1/21 8:38pm

This will lead to an endless path of your child being bullied and not being

andrewth

4/1/21 8:56pm

RE: This will lead to an endless path of your child being bullied and not being

Bin01015

4/1/21 10:37pm

Honestly, I don't get this. We are talking about 6-7 year old girls bullying

777

4/2/21 1:51am

RE: Thank you. I agree. Several people that actually took my post seriously

Preppy

4/1/21 9:10pm

Think about what just happened. You sought advice and the majority of people recommended an alternative course. But a

Slim

4/1/21 9:17pm

Yes deal with the school board that's the route to go.

Baron

4/1/21 8:45pm

Sweep the leg. Don't waste time on Wax On, Wax Off. Teach her to show no mercy.

Q-grr

4/1/21 8:38pm

Haha, yes Sensei!

Ten_Hour_Drives

4/1/21 8:41pm

It’s disappointing to see you joke so callously about a serious situation

SJS

4/1/21 8:52pm

Some people just don’t take bullying seriously. Also, Ten_Hour,

garyfan

4/1/21 8:59pm

It's not disappointing to see you embarrass yourself in this thread.

shammy

4/1/21 10:45pm

go to the principal, they should have a zero tolerance policy on bullying....

BYU Grounds

4/1/21 8:42pm

I am going to say something that I often have to say to clients and it is always awkward. I do a fair amount of estate

vegasnative

4/1/21 10:23pm

<< Deleted >>

Ten_Hour_Drives

4/4/21 6:13pm

No point in talking to the other parents. Leave that to the school.

Bin01015

4/1/21 10:26pm

My advice - take a deep breath

botticus

4/1/21 10:30pm

I agree, except for this: "Ask you daughter what she wants you to do". That road

4/1/21 10:43pm

Yeah, you're probably right.

botticus

4/1/21 10:57pm

In grade school I got bullied cause I didn’t talk. One girl would pinch me and

ByuImaginesDragons

4/2/21 2:01am

My son was in primary with a kid that was a bully. He was large boy and

Bin01015

4/2/21 8:39am

I was bullied as a young teen (late bloomer). However, because of

coolblue

4/2/21 7:36am

I hope your biggest takeaway from this thread isn’t what to do with the school

Medute

4/2/21 7:41am

Whoa! This is a REALLY long thread. I think lots of CB members have issues.

Pangare

4/2/21 8:51am

Large percentage of the thread is OP attacking so . .

4/2/21 9:57am

100% of that is because the OP is being a jerk to people that are trying to

crazY

4/2/21 10:25am

Absolutely. OP turned this thread into a Facebook neighborhood group real fast

4/2/21 10:28am

Most of the posts aren't attacking him, they just disagree w/ his line of thinking.

IceBlueCoug

4/2/21 10:28am

There are subthreads you’re not seeing because they were deleted.

garyfan

4/2/21 1:49pm

In the short term it is appropriate to talk to school officials, including the

TailgateU

4/2/21 10:01am

Thanks everyone for the helpful comments & experiences you shared on this thread

Ten_Hour_Drives

4/4/21 6:43pm

RE: Thanks everyone for the helpful comments & experiences you shared on

SJS

4/4/21 7:35pm

Yup. Yikes.

4/4/21 7:41pm

Super odd...clearly an insecure dude trying to throw out he “does anesthesia.”

Graystation

4/7/21 6:47pm

I figured that meant huffing nitrous. Which, well.. is probably a good thing.

jokerman

4/4/21 8:07pm

I’m not sure I’d want you doing my anesthesia if you get rattled that easily.

crazY

4/4/21 10:35pm

RE: Thanks everyone for the helpful comments & experiences you shared on this thread

IceBlueCoug

4/4/21 8:48pm

<my fo=""> this guy is so sensitive</my>

Champ Kind

4/4/21 11:25pm

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