No matter what corporate HR people say, your employer is paying you for one thing and one thing only. That thing is work. Productive, profit-making work. There is no other reason to pay people to work for you.

Anything and everything you do that does not bring income to the company is something your employer tolerates. Various employers tolerate different things and different amount of things. Call the things your employer tolerates, "Your Personal Stuff" or YPS. You have a right to all the YPS you want. You get to decide how much YPS you want to have. You also largely get to decide how much YPS is visible to your employer, your immediate supervisor, your colleagues, HR, etc.

Economic forces, both micro and macro, influence how much YPS your employer will tolerate. Your employer operates through other employees, whose personal preferences and patience also influence how much YPS will be tolerated. When there are a lot of potential employees to choose from, employers will tolerate less YPS and vice versa.

Some employees have little YPS. Some have a lot of YPS but do not let it be visible to their employer. These employees appear, to their employer, indistinguishable from those who have little YPS. These employees are of higher value, all else being equal.

Employees who choose to have a lot of YPS and also choose to show it to their employer are not tolerated as much as low-YPS employees. Some employees make a practice of shoving their YPS in the faces of their employer and supervisors. These employees are sabotaging their value to their employer and, by extension, sabotaging themselves in the workplace.

Every time your supervisor gives you an order and you ask, "Why," (assuming you are not asking for the purpose and intention of doing the job faster) you are flashing a giant YPS sign to your employer. When you won't stay late because of YPS, there is a cost. You are lowering your value to your employer and testing to see how much YPS it will tolerate.

You can keep moving jobs until you find one with a higher YPS tolerance. That works sometimes. You can lower your YPS visibility. You can decide not to have as much YPS. Some people are just so freaking awesome as employees they can carry a whole lot of YPS around and the employer will tolerate it all.

The choices are all yours. But at least it sounds like you found the YPS threshold at your current workplace at this moment in time. It is likely somewhere between the other 3 managers' YPS levels and yours.